Fears.
One thing I have successfully done in Kyrgyzstan so far has been getting over my fear of the dark. I know, I know, what business does a 22-year old having being afraid of the dark? For 20 years (minus the 2 years I was still crawling around) I have been conditioned to creep around corners, expecting something to jump out of me at any minute- I am sure it has nothing to do with the fact that my older brother and I had “scaring wars” for a good 15 years. I’d have to say the worst was when he waited under my bed for oh, I don’t know, 3 hours- just until the moment I was about to tuck myself into bed for a blissful night’s sleep when he reached out from underneath and grabbed my ankles. At 10 years old, I was about to set the record for being the youngest person in history to have a heart attack. Anyone who has heard me scream before knows my shrill, blood-curling trademark; I guess I developed that perfect ‘horror movie’ scream after many years of practice. At night I still have a lot more stuff to be afraid of here, such as random town drunks and rabid dogs going through the trash but I have seem to have gotten over my fear. I know this because I can now walk to my outhouse back and forth without a flashlight (before I was armed with a flashlight, a stick, and a rock). Alright, so I may not be over my fear 100% but I’m getting there.
I know I said I’d write about what I’ve been doing for the last month or so but frankly I just don’t have the energy to sit down, rehash everything and put it into words eloquent enough to grace my dear reader’s eyes. I’m emotional enough as it is without having to live through everything twice. So let me just say that IST was a really good time, but now a lot of it is only remembered as one big blur. I guess that’s expected when we had around 7 hours of sessions a day then partied from 5 p.m. into the wee hours of the morning... Every. Single. Night. It’s the first time I felt like I was in college since, well… college. Plus we had a lot more at stake here because the next time we will all be together again as a group is in another 8 months. Then after that not till the very end at our Close of Service conference. I definitely wore myself out. We all did. As overwhelming as it was at times it turned out to be a lot of fun.
Also, I haven’t written because not a whole lot has been going on. I had my spring break for 2 weeks but it was really slow because we were banned from travel the entire time because of the anniversary of the revolution. I read, studied Russian, read and studied Russian. That’s about it. The travel restriction timing couldn’t have been worse because a few of us wanted to go down to Jalal-abad or Osh for spring break. Oh well. I guess I’ll have to make time for all that in the next two years.
Last weekend (4.7.06) I went back to Koshoi to see my old host family. Some of the Kyrgyz group ended up going home too because Anna’s birthday and her host Mom’s were both in April. Our plan was to all hang out at my house like old times but I got really really sick again (food poisoning? parasites? no idea?) so I basically laid around all weekend, moaning and groaning in agony. My host mom pulled out the big guns when she said, “you’re not allowed to leave this house until you finish your bowl of rice” my response wasn’t any better, I pouted and pouted and ate one grain of rice at a time until I finished two full tablespoons and finally pushed it away. I guess if I am treated like a child, I also tend to act like one. So all week I’ve had absolutely no energy to do anything and I just feel weak and run down. It’s weird, back home I used to get really sick once a year- here it seems to be once a month. At least I know to expect it now.
Oh yeah, I am also happy to report (for those who care) that my hair is now shoulder-length. For those who didn’t know, I chopped off a good 12 inches of my hair right before I left and donated it to locks-for-love to make the once-a-week banya washings easier. In a lot of ways it turned out to be a blessing because it’s much more manageable this way (and by, ‘manageable’ I really mean, ‘I hate it. It’s ugly. I can’t wait for it to grow back because when I chopped my hair off, it took my personality with it’). I’m waiting to trim it in Turkey because I don’t want someone to botch it. I’ve seen too many bad hairstyles happen to good people here.
A few people have sent me e-mails regarding my mysterious last post that included the Pink Floyd lyrics with no explanation. I have always been a spoiler of surprises but this time there isn’t one. I have been listening to the song for the past few months and just find it shockingly appropriate at times and since I was lazy and didn’t want to post, I thought it would be a good alternative. That’s all. Besides, ‘you’ know who ‘you’ are. Muahahaha.
I know I said I’d write about what I’ve been doing for the last month or so but frankly I just don’t have the energy to sit down, rehash everything and put it into words eloquent enough to grace my dear reader’s eyes. I’m emotional enough as it is without having to live through everything twice. So let me just say that IST was a really good time, but now a lot of it is only remembered as one big blur. I guess that’s expected when we had around 7 hours of sessions a day then partied from 5 p.m. into the wee hours of the morning... Every. Single. Night. It’s the first time I felt like I was in college since, well… college. Plus we had a lot more at stake here because the next time we will all be together again as a group is in another 8 months. Then after that not till the very end at our Close of Service conference. I definitely wore myself out. We all did. As overwhelming as it was at times it turned out to be a lot of fun.
Also, I haven’t written because not a whole lot has been going on. I had my spring break for 2 weeks but it was really slow because we were banned from travel the entire time because of the anniversary of the revolution. I read, studied Russian, read and studied Russian. That’s about it. The travel restriction timing couldn’t have been worse because a few of us wanted to go down to Jalal-abad or Osh for spring break. Oh well. I guess I’ll have to make time for all that in the next two years.
Last weekend (4.7.06) I went back to Koshoi to see my old host family. Some of the Kyrgyz group ended up going home too because Anna’s birthday and her host Mom’s were both in April. Our plan was to all hang out at my house like old times but I got really really sick again (food poisoning? parasites? no idea?) so I basically laid around all weekend, moaning and groaning in agony. My host mom pulled out the big guns when she said, “you’re not allowed to leave this house until you finish your bowl of rice” my response wasn’t any better, I pouted and pouted and ate one grain of rice at a time until I finished two full tablespoons and finally pushed it away. I guess if I am treated like a child, I also tend to act like one. So all week I’ve had absolutely no energy to do anything and I just feel weak and run down. It’s weird, back home I used to get really sick once a year- here it seems to be once a month. At least I know to expect it now.
Oh yeah, I am also happy to report (for those who care) that my hair is now shoulder-length. For those who didn’t know, I chopped off a good 12 inches of my hair right before I left and donated it to locks-for-love to make the once-a-week banya washings easier. In a lot of ways it turned out to be a blessing because it’s much more manageable this way (and by, ‘manageable’ I really mean, ‘I hate it. It’s ugly. I can’t wait for it to grow back because when I chopped my hair off, it took my personality with it’). I’m waiting to trim it in Turkey because I don’t want someone to botch it. I’ve seen too many bad hairstyles happen to good people here.
A few people have sent me e-mails regarding my mysterious last post that included the Pink Floyd lyrics with no explanation. I have always been a spoiler of surprises but this time there isn’t one. I have been listening to the song for the past few months and just find it shockingly appropriate at times and since I was lazy and didn’t want to post, I thought it would be a good alternative. That’s all. Besides, ‘you’ know who ‘you’ are. Muahahaha.
posted by Katie P. at 4:03 AM
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