... it pours.
We all know the saying, when it rains, it pours. Well, for the last week, it's been pouring. You know those old Charlie Brown cartoons when there is a miniature cloud that's raining on Charlie Brown even though the rest of the sky is clear? That's how I feel. I know that the whole point of being here is to integrate into our villages and to assess the needs of the community to help implement strategies for improvement and I hate to say this but if my time here continues like my last week has, I am never going to leave my room again.
(Censored by Peace Corps Kyrgyzstan)
People ask me whether is better here or there and I try to explain in the most diplomatic way possible that it's not better here, it's not better there, it's different and impossible to compare. There are good things and bad things about every single place in the world (okay, except Australia) and if things were so much better than America, then why am I here right now? I know that every generation, people want to do better than the generation before them. But I wish I could tell them that better isn't necessarily America. They only have this idea of what it is and don't understand that there is struggle no matter where you are. Not everyone is happy there either.
I guess this is something that I am going to have to get used to because I don't think it's going to change or stop anytime soon, so the only thing I can do is change the way I react to it and file it under the curiosity of others. I know I can't take everything personal, but it's easy to forget sometimes. I feel like I have been wandering around for the last 4 with my head in the clouds soaking up a different culture and experience but now my sponge is full so everything is just overflowing and I don't see any way to control or stop it. I hate speaking in analogies but I really don't have any other way to explain it. I guess my only solution at this point is to figure out the things I am and am not willing to do, then say yes to the things I am and find out a way to gracefully decline the things I am not.
It's not easy being here, sometimes it is a struggle to even find the energy to get out of bed. It's easy to lose sight of why I am here and my purpose but hopefully it will become clear soon.
(Censored by Peace Corps Kyrgyzstan)
People ask me whether is better here or there and I try to explain in the most diplomatic way possible that it's not better here, it's not better there, it's different and impossible to compare. There are good things and bad things about every single place in the world (okay, except Australia) and if things were so much better than America, then why am I here right now? I know that every generation, people want to do better than the generation before them. But I wish I could tell them that better isn't necessarily America. They only have this idea of what it is and don't understand that there is struggle no matter where you are. Not everyone is happy there either.
I guess this is something that I am going to have to get used to because I don't think it's going to change or stop anytime soon, so the only thing I can do is change the way I react to it and file it under the curiosity of others. I know I can't take everything personal, but it's easy to forget sometimes. I feel like I have been wandering around for the last 4 with my head in the clouds soaking up a different culture and experience but now my sponge is full so everything is just overflowing and I don't see any way to control or stop it. I hate speaking in analogies but I really don't have any other way to explain it. I guess my only solution at this point is to figure out the things I am and am not willing to do, then say yes to the things I am and find out a way to gracefully decline the things I am not.
It's not easy being here, sometimes it is a struggle to even find the energy to get out of bed. It's easy to lose sight of why I am here and my purpose but hopefully it will become clear soon.
posted by Katie P. at 9:45 PM
3 Comments:
You were strong enough to make the life altering decision to go over there and you will be strong enough to get through these difficult times. Help others in need while staying true to yourself and keep your head up.
There's a rainbow after every rainstorm.
I love you Katie and miss you so much. It sounds like things are a bit rough, but I wanted to tell you again that I am so amazed by what you are doing. You are a strong girl and I know that you will get through this rough spot. I will say a prayer for you tonight in church. All my love, Linds.
Oh Katie, I'm sorry to hear people are taking advantage of you. That's the worst. I admire your strength and perseverance! What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger- (at least that's what I try to tell myself). Please know I'm thinking about you and know you can get through this!
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